When it comes to rugby league, what does it mean to be a "true fan"?
On a few Dragons web forums I read, the phrase "true fan" is used in much the same way as "un-Australian" - as an insult that designed to ridicule behaviour that the speaker doesn't like.
You criticise your team? You're not a true fan. Decide not to go to games anymore? You're not a true fan.
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Dragons' biggest fan competition Don't own at least one jersey? Not a true fan. You don't have a Dragons tattoo, haven't named your kids after the players in the 1977 premiership winning team and you still talk to family members who support other teams? Well, you're not a true fan.
Of course, that sort of definition is meaningless, given that it changes depending on who's talking.
So how do you define a true fan? Does it come down to how many jerseys you own? And is the guy who owns six more of a fan than the guy who just has one?
And if you buy every piece of crappy merchandise with the Dragons logo (and my God there is some crap out there - seems the NRL will slap club logos on anything these days) does that also buy you automatic entry into true fandom?
Maybe it's determined by the amount of games you go to. But that guy who has seen every single game for the last 20 years, does the club "belong" to him more than someone who catches a few games a year but also recognises winter weekends are about more than just footy?
And what of the guy who lives in, say, Perth and is too smart to blow thousands of dollars a year flying to the east coast to see games. It's hardly fair that the tyranny of distance precludes him from being a "true fan"?
If you decide to go to a mate's wedding when there's a game on - does that rule you out of being a true fan? Or what if you prefer to stay at home and watch the Dragons on TV because your seat is more comfortable, the beer is cheaper and you don't have to stand in any unpleasant puddles while using the men's room?
In case you hadn't already guessed, I've come up with a what I reckon is a workable definition of what a true fan is. It doesn't have anything to do with the amount of merchandise you own, how many club stats you can recall, how many games in a row you've seen or even how many Dragons tattoos you have.
The definition of a true fan comes down to just two things: pain and persistence. If it hurts when your team loses but you turn up the following weekend to watch them again, then you're a true fan.
For me, there are two things that appeal about this definition. Firstly, it's egalitarian, rather than making fandom into some exclusive club with high standards. Basically, it means the guy who has just started supporting his team this season is considered on a par with someone who has been with them for years - because they both feel the same way.
Secondly, it rules out those hated fair-weather fans. Those who have stuck by their club year-in and year-out loathe these bandwagon jumpers who have suddenly turned up when things are going well in the hope of sharing in some of the joy. And that really irritates real fans who can feel as though these interlopers haven't done anything to deserve the joy. Also, they worry that there might not be enough joy to go around if they have to share it with people who can't even pronounce the five-eighth's name properly.
For the fair-weather fan, it's all about entertainment so there's no pain when things suddenly stop going so well. And, of course there's no persistence either because they're off like a shot to find the next bandwagon to jump on.
Which leaves the rest of us in pain. But staying true, knowing that one day, our loyalty will be rewarded.
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