It was begging to be done and to be honest, we’re surprised it’s taken this long.
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But hold onto your Dothraki horses Game of Thrones fans – we have your ultimate guide to Westeros in the Gong (or is that the Gong in Westeros?).
Created by avid GoT fan Patrick and published on local blog Gong Guide, the tongue-in-cheek comparison between the fictitious Westeros and our own seaside principality is hilarious.
Patrick says the link between King’s Landing and the Wollongong CBD is obvious, comparing the Piccadilly Centre area with the slums of Kings Landing.
“Nowra Bridge is much like The Wall in that it separates civilisation from the wildlings.''
“If [Queen] Cersei had to do her walk of shame in Wollongong, she would start at the top of Crown St Mall and end up near the hospital,” he says, referencing a scene in which the Queen is paraded through the city naked to atone for her sins.
Another obvious choice is Port Kembla and the Iron Islands, with Patrick suggesting while “a bit gritty”, both have populations that are “fiercely proud of their home”.
Winterfell, everyone’s favourite northern outpost in Westeros, is likened to Thirroul given apparently residents of both areas “feel like they are better than the rest of the country” and have “no desire to ever go south”.
While The Wall lies north of Winterfell in Westeros, Patrick goes south to Nowra Bridge to find his equivalent.
“Nowra Bridge is much like The Wall in that it separates civilisation from the wildlings,” he jokes.
“No one from Wollongong really wants to go past the wall, and the people who do acknowledge that it is very dangerous mission.
“On the flip side, the wildlings from Nowra would give anything to escape to the other side.”
Other comparisons include The Vale and Moss Vale (sitting back and watching things unfold from high on their mountain); Dorne and Dapto (both operate on their own terms and would willingly break away from the rest of the realm); Braavos and Stanwell Park (money central); Vaes Dothraki and Helensburgh (cause everyone in Helensburgh seems to own a horse); and Meereen and Kiama (independent cities opposed to change – think council mergers).
Patrick was also quick to suggest Meereen ruler Daenerys Targaryen, with her stark blonde hair, is “essentially a female Gareth Ward”.
Speaking with the Mercury at the weekend, Patrick said the idea came to him following a conversation with his partner during the latest episode of the hit HBO show
”We were talking about what The Wall equivalent would be in Wollongong, then we started to see similarities between Westeros and the rest of the Wollongong region, and had some fun drawing comparisons between the world of Game of Thrones and our home town,” he said.
“As I was already writing articles for GongGuide.com, I decided to put a list together.”
Patrick said the post has so far been shared more than 70 times.
“People seem to find it funny,” he said.
“I've not seen any negative feedback yet, but there might be some comments out there. Mostly I think people can see that it isn't meant to be offensive and its all in good fun.”
When asked about any characters that stood out to him, Patrick was quick to joke about our own regional leader.
“Our [King] Joffrey would have to be Noreen Hay,” he said.
“[But] I don't think the Illawarra has a Ramsay though. No one seems to be that despicable.”