A judge has warned an Illawarra publican there is "no excuse for men to exercise control over vulnerable women" after he spat in his ex-partner's face during a "serious assault" last year.
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Gordon Despotovski, the proprietor of Port Kembla's Commercial Hotel, fronted Wollongong District Court on Wednesday where he was handed an 18-month community corrections order.
The 32-year-old pleaded guilty to common assault and stalk/intimidation, which stemmed from an incident against his on-off partner in Wollongong.
The woman woke up to an angered Despotovski shining a torch in her face in the early hours of the morning in question, before he hurled verbal abuse at her.
While restricting her as she attempted to escape from the bed, the court heard that Despotovski told the woman he found messages on her phone that she sent to another man.
The woman was trapped by Despotovski for over an hour who would not let her off the bed, as she made noises to signal she was in trouble, according to the agreed facts.
At one point, she screamed and bashed on the window to get help.
While on top of the woman, Despotovski phoned the man she had been messaging.
At one stage, Despotovski also threatened the woman that he would send the contents of her phone to her 15-year-old daughter.
A neighbour heard the woman's plight and called police, who arrived at the scene a short time later to find the woman hunched over and visibly crying.
Despotovski was arrested and taken to the Wollongong police station.
On Wednesday, the court heard Despotovski was charged with two other indictable offences after the incident, which had since been withdrawn.
He had remained on "strict" bail conditions since April this year, which included a curfew that was checked frequently by police.
Despotovski's lawyer Michael Ainsworth said since the other allegations had been withdrawn, the bail conditions were "overkill".
Yet Judge Andrew Haesler said the conditions were appropriate to the original charges.
Mr Ainsworth told the court the relationship between the woman and the man she exchanged messages with revolved around drugs, which "set him off".
"This was obviously a relationship that had its up and downs," Mr Ainsworth said.
"He has agreed that he spat in her face ... but he was just so outraged and offended at the betrayal involved.
"While it was a disgusting act, there's no physical injury."
Judge Haesler said the explanation of jealousy didn't mitigate the seriousness of the offence, "not in this court anyway".
In reading his decision, Judge Haesler went on to say "there is no excuse for men ... to exercise control over their partner, spit in their face, demean them, and threaten them".
"It's unacceptable behaviour ... all too often the perpetrator believes what they do is justified ... because they have been wronged.
"These was a serious assault to spit in someone's face, it cannot be excused by anyone. Acts of intimidation were prolonged and directed."
Judge Haesler noted that Despotovski did not have serious matters on his criminal record which allowed leniency in sentencing.
"This appears to have been a one-off incident in what was a relatively volatile relationship," he said.
"It's one that's not likely to be repeated ... as the offender has demonstrated his capacity to abide by provisional domestic violence order and the extremely strict bail conditions placed upon him."
Despotovski was handed an 18-month community corrections order, including any supervision that may be ordered, with a condition to engage in a domestic violence program.
An apprehended violence order against Despotovski to protect the woman will continue.
Read more Illawarra court and crime stories here.
Grace Crivellaro
Court reporter for the Illawarra Mercury.
Court reporter for the Illawarra Mercury.
