How Penny Wong changed views on gay families

Prompted by an audience question about why the shadow treasurer thinks he and his wife make better parents than the Finance Minister and her female partner, the segment ends with Wong quietly but firmly declaring: "I know what my family is worth".

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It may only be brief but activists are calling the exchange a ''watershed moment'' in their campaign for same-sex marriage – both allowing people to understand the debate at a personal level and demonstrating its status as a mainstream political issue.

On Tuesday, Wong's response trended on Twitter and the clip has had more than 71,000 views on YouTube (up from 53,000 this time yesterday). A company has even started selling "I know what my family is worth" T-shirts and stickers.

The National Times understands that Wong and her office were overwhelmed by calls and messages of support immediately after her Q&A appearance and that the messages continued into the week – a rare occurrence as the Finance Minister does not seek to campaign publicly on the gay marriage issue.

But Wong was not expecting such a personal question on Monday night – as is clear from her look of surprise and intake of breath when the question was asked. And then from her off-the-cuff response to Hockey's answer.

The shadow treasurer certainly squirmed under the spotlight of live national TV.

"I must confess my views have changed since I've had children", he said. "I think in this life we've got to aspire to give our children what I believe is the very best circumstances, and that's to have a mother and a father.''

In response, Wong began with: ''Well, there's almost nothing I can say.

''When you say those things, Joe, what you're saying to not just me but people like me is that the most important thing in our lives, which is the people we love, is somehow less good, less valued,'' she said.

Wong went on to acknowledge that comments like Hockey's were hurtful, but concluded by saying: ''I know what my family is worth.''

Australian Marriage Equality campaign co-ordinator Rodney Croome has been a gay rights activist for more than 20 years and sees Wong's appearance as a "watershed moment" that will change hearts and minds.

This week, he says that AME have seen their web traffic double with people either getting in touch to offer messages of support or contact an MP via their website.

Croome says that even though Wong's appearance came off the back of US President Barack Obama's support for gay marriage last week, more people have been citing Wong as their reason for their messages.

"It was only a very short exchange, but I feel that it will have a tremendous impact,'' Croome says, noting that those contacting AME tend to be both older and straight. "It really struck a chord".

Croome says Wong's ''gentle, quiet, self-confidence'' also illustrates the importance of personal stories for making a difference in the same-sex marriage debate.

"People saw beyond the politics to how it actually affects people," he said.

Equal Love convenor Ali Hogg - who organised a rally of 4000 people for same-sex marriage in Melbourne last weekend - said that it was rare to hear a politician speak from the heart.

"When someone says something so offensive in front of her [Wong's] face, it's a bit hard for her to just pull out the party line," Hogg says.

GetUp! national director Simon Sheikh says that he has also noticed an increase in people getting in touch and engaging in social media over the past week, which he thinks is due to a combination of Obama and Wong's statements.

Sheikh was not expecting the same-sex marriage campaign to rev up until next month, with the expected release of a Senate committee report. But he says that Wong and Obama have fired up the campaign and showed that it is a mainstream issue.

"This has provided fantastic momentum," he says.

"I think we're finally reaching the moment in the public debate where it looks like the Emperor's got no clothes."

He says people can expect more high-profile Australians, like comedian Magda Szubanski, to ''come out'' in coming months, in support of the campaign.

But Sheikh is realistic about the chances of same-sex marriage legislation – due in the parliament at the end of the year – passing the House of Representatives this time around.

He sees the campaign as a "multi-year" one, and says that GetUp! is aiming to get a majority of Labor MPs voting in favour of same-sex marriage.

Even though Prime Minister Julia Gillard does not support same-sex marriage, Labor MPs will get a conscience vote. But with Opposition Leader Tony Abbott both opposed to gay marriage and a conscience vote, it is highly unlikely the bill will succeed.

But with recent polls putting support for gay marriage legislation at more than 60 per cent, this may be one example where the Parliament lags behind the voters.