In the message read out to the congregation at St Patrick's Catholic Church in Bega by Rev James Wood, Ms Lambert said: "Shane, Riley and Travis, I'm with you. Have fun. Stay safe and warm. Stop fighting. Stop working. Be you. Go fishing.

"Tell me what I'm here for, what you want me to do.

"Shane, Riley, Travis and God, I know you're listening.''

Mr O'Neill, 28, had been night fishing on Tuesday last week when Riley and Travis, seated in a pram, toppled off the wharf at Tathra.

He had dived in to try to save them but perished too.

Today, in a town 18km away where he worked as a butcher, members of Mr O'Neill's beloved football club joined other members of the community to pay their respects.

His fiancee, Stacey Lambert, will be surrounded by family and friends who will be invited to light candles for the young boys and their father.

The leading celebrant, Reverend Chris Short, said Stacey had chosen music for the service that summed up her relationship with each family member who died.

During the service Members of the Outback Club by Lee Kernaghan was played, as well as Everything I do, I do it for you by Bryan Adams.

"That spoke of her relationship and incredible love for Shane,'' Reverend Short said.

He said Stacey would need support not just for the few weeks following the tragedy but on an on-going basis.

She chose bright colours to adorn the casket to remember the bright lives of her family, not the dark end that they met.